Holy Fish Sticks Batman! Batman and Robin were at a church and saw a priest eating fish sticks.

human centipede

What happened to the woman who walked down a dark alley way? She found a lolly.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock, knock Who's there? Not Susie

How does God choose who goes to heaven? I'm just kidding, there's no God.

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

Let's play twenty questions. Alright, but I have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

What do you call a dumb friend? Sam.

I need a side cart on my motorcycle just for my diick

how are a ferrari and a pile of dead babies similar? neither are good to have in your garage when the police come.

Why was the man in the kitchen? Because his wife was raped and killed.

My dog got out of its cage So I found it and beat the shit out of my neighbors kid.

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family.

When I was little I used to love to dig up worms. Out of my ass.

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

did you hear about the guy who got his left leg and left arm cut off? he's all right now

What do you call a 5000 pound gorilla? Obese - gorillas should weigh around 400 pounds.

A jellyfish walks into a bar, the bar doesnt appreciate him, so he retreats back to his jellyfish lands.

What do you call 4 Mexicans getting into a car late at night? 3rd Shift carpooling

Yeah, Eliza, its me, its so strange, you are the only one I remember from highschool, I was worried you had forgotten about me, anyway, yeah type as if you where speaking to him, and dont worry, I know I could not keep a secret back then, and I told Nero, so and he promised me he would kindly break my fingers if I told anyone, besides I dont do that anymore trust me.

What do you call a bathtub full of dead babies? A tradegy.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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