A: u wanna die? B: does anyone really wanna die, i mean logistically, un-less u are suicidal, why would you wanna die? A: I do wanna die. B: ur a freak and you should consider getting help person A never got help, on his way to getting help at a certified physician he got hit by a bus, his body can be found at the intersection of church ave. and flatbush. And i would say rest in piece but cars drive over him daily, and thats not to peaceful

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Their was once a man named Bob Clemens who really wanted to have sex with an underage girl. So one day he went on an online chat site to find one. He ran into this young girl and told her all the things he wanted to do to her and she told him that she had never done anything and really wanted to try it. Bob went over to her house one day and she told him to sit down and grab some cookies while she came back. She came back and Bob gave her the roughest pounding that any human being could recieve.

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There are three muffins sitting in an oven. The first one says nothing. The second one also says nothing. They're just muffins and muffins can't talk.

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Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They beat her.

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How do you change your dishwasher into a snowblower? Give her a shovel.

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

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Wanna hear a race joke?.....whoops, ya missed it

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Why did the cop hate black people? He was a racist.

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What happened to the boy who survived a tragic car accident?? He stepped out of the car and got hit by a semi.

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what did the cow say to shabab?....... want some milk

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why did the grandmother forget her grandsons name? she has Alzheimers so she is slowly forgetting all her relatives

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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How do you approach a hot guy in the library? Very quietly.

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What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

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Q: What did the train say when it sneezed twice? A: Trains are inanimate objects, thus they cannot sneeze or talk. Are you an idiot?

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Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

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A man walked into a bar. He bought a pint.

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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How do you make pie without the oven? I dont kow, go google it.

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Roses are red Violets are red Bushes are red Why's my garden on fire?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops