A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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I'll have a chocolate milkshake, hold the onions.

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What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

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Why is sally sad her parents abuse her daily

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Barman says to a horse at the bar ' Are you sad or upset?' Horse says 'No' Barman says 'Well why the long face?' Horse says 'Because I'm a horse'

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Q) What's worse than getting a parking ticket? A) The Black Death

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Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock, whos there? Not sally

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Did you here about the Asian couple who had a stupid baby? They named him Sum Ting Wong

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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Cool story bro. Tell it again.

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Transgenders! More than meets the eye! Transgenders! Girl was once a guy! LGBTs wage the battle to destroy The homophobic forces of Christianity! Transgenders! Homos in disguise!

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What's better than winning gold in the special olympics? Not being retarded.

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XD, I know I noticed myself, I was like "why the fuck did I post that shit?" Rellez XD okay sistah, I think I am just gonna get some sleep now, but Nero, is not Justin Bibble the first one?

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What's worse than finding a hair in your soup? Slavery.

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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What happened to the man who lost his job? He couldn't support his family so they all became homeless and eventually died of starvation.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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What is blue and smells like blue paint? Blue paint.

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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What do you call a dead man in a ditch? Phil.

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what did mohammed say to Jesus? nothing they lived in completly different time periods

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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