why did the grinch steal christmas? The grinch had a rough childhood. he had an abusive father and a crack cocaine addicted mother, and as a result, the grinch never got a christmas of his own. The grinch steals the happiness of christmas from the who's becuase his horrible childhood has caused him to take his anger out on everyone around him, because the grinch believes that this will make up for his depressing childhoofd

A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

I'M JOSH BROWN!!!!!

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

Waiter, waiter! There is a fly in my soup. Sorry about that sir, we will replace your order and make your meal complementary.

A father walks in on his kid masturbating to pictures of horses and promptly divorces his wife.

Wanna hear a joke? Once upon a time, there was a successful Mexican.

What is green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels part.

Call of Duty Infinite Warfare

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What's the difference between and orange? The horse wasn't wearing a saddle.

A neutron goes into a bar and asks the bartender, "How much for a beer?" The bartender, millions of times larger than the infinitesimally small subatomic particle, does not hear his question and so does not reply.

3 men walk into a bar. The fourth one ducks. Thumbs up if you get it.

What's the best thing for a hangover? Heavy drinking the night before.

Ask me if I'm a dinosaur. Are you dinosaur? No.

What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

A blonde was drinking water from the water fountain. She was very thirsty.

How do you make an electrician cry? You kidnap him and his mother, tie them both to chairs in your garage, and force him to watch you stab his mother repeatedly in the face while laughing and licking up her blood and tears. Then cut his arms and legs off, lock him in a cage with his mothers body, and go in there everyday and eat a delicious meal while watching him starve to death next to his dead mother.

Knock knock. Who's there? Auntie.

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

What the difference between a black person and a piece of shit in a bucket? The bucket

What's more exiting than watching football Escaping through the underground railroad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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