Knock knock knock OCD

Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you. I slipped you a roofie, get ready for me.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's treehouse? No. It's quite nice, her father made it himself.

What did the redneck say about his missing tractor? Where's my tators.

What's nice and looks like a rat? Ryan Kavanagh, I lied about the nice part

Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

What do you call a drummer without a girlfriend? Homeless

Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm only 13 so if you have sex with me it's illegal.

1100110001012....HOLY S@&$ A 2!

Wood is brown...... Grass is green...... Now what color are roses?

What's worse than the Holocaust? Two Holocausts.

Where's a bad place to park your car? In a no-parking zone

What are the similarities between aaron ash and a cow? they both have 7 stomachs.

A black child gives away his piece of fried chicken. He is allergic, and eats some watermelon instead.

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

Why is six afraid of seven? Because six is a numerophobe.

What did my uncle get for Christmas? Me... MagicMonkey

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Someone clearly messed up on naming the flower. Violet is synonymous with purple, Which is obviously NOT blue; It's the mixture between blue and red.

What do you call a bear in an elevator?...A fire hazard.

what did the boy with no arms get for easter? a cane.

your friend is so gay that he cuts of dicks as his part time job. and enjoys it.

What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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