You attend a school atop a hill in the middle of the town. A river flows east of the hill, under the bridge built for the highway that runs two miles behind the school. You mother leaves for work at 6:00 a.m., and your brother leaves at 9:00 a.m. Schools starts at 7:30 a.m., and you have to pick up a sandwich on the way, for lunch. Also, you forgot to do an assignment that's due today, and it'll take you at least thirty minutes to complete it. How do you get to school on time? You walk.

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How do you mess with Hellen Keller? Re-arrange her furniture.

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How do you stop your golf ball from hitting a goose? You dont.

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What is about the size of a sausage, flesh-colored and looks like a penis, if you illuminate it with a flashlight on monday nights? - a penis.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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I like doodle. XoXo Jamie

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Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

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Why are fish bad at basketball? Because they're afraid of the net...

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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"Ask me if I'm a tree." "Are you a tree?" "...no..?"

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In my country we don't swim, we drown.

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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What is the difference between and Jew and a Boy Scout? The Boy Scout comes back from camp.

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A elephant drowns when it was swimming, why did this happen? Who cares its already dead!

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Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

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The Sun is vital to our human existence on the Earth. It also causes cancer.

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What happens when you mix a camel and a penguin? A cenguin!

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racism...deal with it!

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

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What's worse than breastfeeding a wolverine? Force-breastfeeding a wolverine.

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In Soviet Russia, life was very hard due to the failing economy and oppressive government.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops