It's a penguin that breathes by its asshole. One day, he sits down, and he dies.

Knock knock Who's there? April April who? April fools

darude- sandstorm

whant to hear my best inpression of a hijacking ok kjgnkdgsjikdfhjnknkdfngknhfkfbnkf

how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

There are two types of people in the world: 1. people who can extrapolate from incomplete data And I have two wonderful pieces of advice: 1. Never tell anyone everything you know

There was porn on the Internet I masturbated to it, but my parents caught me, and I can't ever leave the house again until I'm 18.

hey John will you make some copies

Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

Whats the answer to life? im not sure

Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

Roses are Blue Violets are Red Watermelons are green Refridgerator

If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick basterd !

What did PSY say about his newest song? Probably something in Korean.

One day a young gentleman was walking down the street. He sees a wounded dog laying there on the sidewalk. He goes to tend to the wounded animal. It bites his hand. He rushes to the hospital and tests positive for rabies. The man has to be vaccinated and the dog terminated.

What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

JUST KIDDING^

Q. What's the difference between a bench and a Mexican? A. A bench is an inanimate object used for sitting on while a Mexican is a human being.

how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

A man sees the most beautiful woman he's ever seen on the street. He takes her into a dark alley and r.apes her.

Wait a moment, I will see what I can do.

why did jimmy loose the bike race. because he never entered.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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