Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you get when an elephant and a pig have baby? Nothing, mating between animals must take place between animals of the same species, thus making it impossible to cross these two animals

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

thumb_up thumb_down +17

why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what does pedobear get for christmas ? nothing he's the one giving love to all kids .

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Why was the black man hired at the clothing store? He needed some money to feed his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Knock, knock. Door opened.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Friends are like trees, if you deprive them from water they'll die.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Rebecca Black walks into a bar she took the back seat

thumb_up thumb_down +17

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

thumb_up thumb_down +17

Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What is worse then a bus driver A man who drives an ice cream truck

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What's worse than watching 5 homeless men have an orgy? Waking up and having to clean the sheets

thumb_up thumb_down +17

What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A man jumped off a cliff. He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a bear with no teeth? A Gummy Bear!!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

hey its jerry hey its dj want to see my goat noooo

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you call a black man running for congress? A: Congressional Candidate

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops