Q-how did the blind man cross the road? A-with a guide dog

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Were can you find a bag of meth?

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Coke or Pepsi? Trick question, beer.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? A gameboy

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How much is that doggie in the window? $4.95 + Shipping&Handling

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Where does Charlie Sheen buy his clothes? Winners

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Why didn't the black man eat lunch? Because his lunch asked him not to eat it.

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knock knock come in!

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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A man walked into a bar Ouch!

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why did suzy drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock. whos there? not suzy.

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A Hideo Kojima AntiJoke Typed by Hideo Kojima. Idea By Hideo Kojima. Concept By Hideo Kojima Spacing by Hideo Kojima Controlled for typos by Hideo Kojima Overseen By Hideo Kojima Aproved By Hideo Kojima. Reconsidered By Hideo Kojima Accepted by Hideo Kojima What took you so long?

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What do you call a black women serving 60 years in prison? A prisoner.

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Human: Are you a frayed knot? Frayed knot: I'm afraid so.

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What kind of nun would never drink milk? One who suffers from a severe lactose intolerance.

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A black guy, a jew, and an asian walk into a bar, have a beer each, and then leave, because they have high-paying jobs and don't want to risk getting DUIs.

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because it followed the trail of bird feed strewn across it.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

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what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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What is the sun's favorite day of the week? The sun is a mass of incadescent gas and cannot feel emotions; therefore, it cannot have a favorite day of the week.

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being drunk in a mall sounds like it would be alot of fun . . . . . . . but that is public intoxication and that is against the law

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Why is the earth round? Because God saw it was flat and thought "too flat lets turn it around" And all was good.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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