Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

What's 9+ 10?! 19

Grace Ackerson

What would you do for a Klondike bar? I'd go all the way to the store and buy one.

And if we met in 1780, I was a white southern aristocratic plantation owner and you were my dark skinned servant lady ... slave Whenever I could get away from the Mrs., I'd go to your shed and then I'd steal you kisses. But let's be serious, I'd still work you full time as a slave, there's a difference between romantic language and a complete disregard for socioeconomic trends.

-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

What time will the little girl get up for school? Never, she died in her sleep.

A Mexican walked into a bar. He never came back out.

Q: Why are black people black? A: Cause they're from Africa.

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

Wanna here a good joke? Sure, but you spelled hear wrong.

What's a lil plus a lot A little more then a lot

What srtarts with "P" and ends in "orn"? Popcorn

what's the worst lie in the universe? I swear to god that was my last piece of gum

Want to hear a joke? Unequal rights.

Why is French Fries not a Chinese Food? Answer: Because the Chinese people will get offended.

What's for dinner tonight? Your mom's vagina.

I'm a fork. Fork you!!

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

How do you wake up your grandmother........ You don't, she had a massive heart attack and died in her sleep

Why didn't the millionaire jump off the Golden Gate Bridge? He said "I don't have to commit suicide, that's for poor people" (Wyndellberg)

what's worse than stubbing your toe on cement being a Jew during the holcaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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