Why was Sally gone for her father's birthday? She went on a camping trip with her friends. Sally's friends were brutally murdered and she was kidnapped. The kidnapper cut off her arms and legs and left her in the middle of a suburban intersection late at night. The autopsy revealed that Sally died from blood loss from losing her limbs. It also revealed that she had contracted a fast growing tumor in her brain which would have most likely killed her within days of the murder anyway. Her family was living in the country illegally so her DNA did not reveal a computer file of her person. Her parents were not informed of her death for years because of this. When it was determined that the victim was the parents' daughter they were arrested for living in the country illegally and were not able to have a funeral.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A blind, black guy walks into a building. Unfortunately it was a secret KKK building and they beat him, raped him and left him to die. Luckily he was found alive and transported to the hospital. To bad the hospital was bombed by Al Queda.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do when life hands you lemons? Go home, look for the ingredients on which to make proper, delicious lemonade. Afterward, I would go in the front yard, make a stand, then make a sign that says $1.00 lemonade. Then you know make millions on your master-mind plan that no one else ever thought of.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

knock knock whos there open the door and find out

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

First the lord created light by shouti... ...Then the lord travelled back in time in order to create voice before that. The lord then said "I almost logic and everything failed at the very beginning. he corrected himself and saw it was good,

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's purple and tastes like grapes? Grapes

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Justin Beiber walks into a bar. He is not served any alcohol because he is not yet 21.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Have you ever ate a donut? Yes I have. In fact, the donut I ate recently was fairly delicious.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

whats the difference between a brick wall and a jew? jews wear yamakas

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where do you live? In a house

thumb_up thumb_down -5

(joker) Do you like fishsticks? (recipient) "No" (any response from the joker at this point qualifies as anti joke)

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I just pooped in my boyfriends mouth. He ate it. Ps. I am a boy

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Two Jewish men walk into a bar...just kidding it was a gas chamber.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What do you call a black man who sells drugs? A pharmacist.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So, today I was walking down the street... I met a black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What mother loved her son so much, she gave him a scar on his forehead for it? Lily Potter.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A cat walks into a bar. What's the first thing it says? Absolutely nothing. It was knocked out.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What is big, white, and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? Donald Trump

thumb_up thumb_down -5

I used to be an adventurer like you, then I took an arrow to the knee and had armor so it deflected off. Then I found out my wife was pregnant.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops