What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Whats brown, large, thick, and sticky? a stick

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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Why do many men find it difficult to make eye contact? Debilitating autism.

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

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Q:what's black and white and red all over? A:a panda bear that's been shot in the face.

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two tomatos walked over the road and..... just kidding tomatos can't walk.

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How do you fix a chimpanzee? With a monkey wrench

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Why wouldn't they give Helen Keller a driver's liscense? Because she was a woman.

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How do you get Doctor Phil in a bikini? Give him a little alcohol to ease inhibitions and offer him a suitable bribe.

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While i was driving, my son asked, 'Have you had an accident in the last 5 years Dad?' And I replied, 'You're almost four now son'.

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What did the white boy say to the black boy? You're black

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Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

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A man walks into a bar. He says "ouch".

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Why should you be concerned if you see a black midget with no arms and no legs falling off a building? He might get hurt.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Why did the meme cross the road? MEME XD

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Why did the black man go to church? Because his father died.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Chuck Norris." "Chuck Norris who?" "NOBODY SAYS 'CHUCK NORRIS WHO'!!!"

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friend' Knock Knock! you; no one home go away

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What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

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Who enjoys hearty wank sessions with friends and long walks on the beach? David Cameron.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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