Hey we just met And this is crazy But my name's Kony And I stole your baby

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What game will Helen Keller always win? A: Marco Polo. She is a fast swimmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How do you get a one handed man out of a tree Wave

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Wanna hear a dirty joke? A little boy falls into the mud Wanna hear a clean joke? He takes a bath with bubbles Wanna hear a dirty joke? Bubbles is Michal Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

one day 2 strawberrys walked to the ice cream store and ordered a small cup of banana ice cream they were realley happy they were later taken in and tortured and raped

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the man die? He helped others before placing his own oxygen mask on.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How do we know that Adam was white? We don't. The Bible doesn't specify the race or etnicity of either Adam or Eve.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What is brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer..... I'm going to rip the scalp off of your son and where it on my face to a Cherokee Sacrificial Ceremony The other lawyer was actually a lightbulb

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the clock say to the other clock? .. were both lawyers!

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man was caught by the Aztecs for stealing from their tombs. The Aztecan chief said,"Sometime during the next week I will kill you, but I will do it when you least expect." The man was then given a room. He deduced that he couldn't be killed on the last day, Saturday, or else he would see it coming, so it must be before Saturday. He then deduced that it couldn't be on Friday, because he would expect it to be before Saturday. He used this logic to rule out every other day of the week, therefore the Aztecan chief would never kill him. He was killed on Wednesday.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two dinosaurs go to a theme park. On the way home they contemplate that they didn't really enjoy themselves. They decide to buy some ice cream to cheer them up a bit. They are severely frustrated by the lack of fun they had for the money they paid. Then they go to sleep. I completely forgot how this joke went, but your mom's a slut.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What does AIDS smell like? AIDS has no smell. AIDS is a diease contracted though sexual contact with another being with the diease. It greatly increases the risk of infections and malignancy. Although AIDS has no smell, in the final stages large sores develope on the surface of the skin. This means you are going to die. Thus, HIV/AIDS has no smell.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do Bruce Lee and Michael Jackson have in common? They are both dead

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Whats Brown and fluffy ASIAN TITS

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the 15 year old boy always alone in his bedroom making strange noises? Because he was struggling to fight back the tears following his single mother's recent suicide, driven by her despair over the reality that her son was an out of control drug addict, just like his no-good father who ran out on them.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the little boy get for Christmas? Presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

thumb_up thumb_down +3

I popped my head over my sexy neighbour's fence today to see her lying in her bikini. "Wow, you're gorgeous!" I burst out, "I hope you know how to do CPR." "Why?" she asked with a giggle, "Because I've taken your breath away?" "No," I replied. "I've just run your son over out front."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A man sees another man sitting on a bench with a pickle in his ear. He asks the man "Why do you have a pickle in your ear?" The other man replies "What? I couldn't hear you because I have a pickle in my ear."

thumb_up thumb_down +3

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops