What happened when the man lost his sandwich? He couldnt eat.

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Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

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A kid goes to Band Camp and comes back better at the Trumpet.

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What did the jobless man get for Christmas? Fired...

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One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is something I love to eat, the other is a watermelon.

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Real Joke: The US Air Force operates Seymour Johnson Air Force Base. It is named for a seaman. Go look it up.

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A man walks into a bar... The steal bar hurt his face and had to get stitches.

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Q: what's better than ice cream A: not having aids

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I have the answer to why the child stepped on a ball-he was dumb

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why did sally fall off the swing? because she was a fish.

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas? Nothing, he's homeless.

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Whats pink and fluffy? Pink fluff

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A street performer was sitting on a curb playing guitar when a black man walked up and put some money in the guitar case. The street performer nodded in appreciation of the man's donation and continued to play his instrument.

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Q. What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A. Where's my tractor?

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what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

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What is worse then finding repeated jokes on anti jokes? finding a womr in your apple

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Q. What's green, has wheels and flies? A. A garbage truck.

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whats black and blue and red all over? my wife shhh!

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A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

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What did the dog say to the cat Nothing dogs cant talk

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Get in the van.

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roses are red violets are blue i have shit in my mouth so screw you

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I used to be an adventurer like you, Then I settled down in a quiet place in the woods with a girl and raised a family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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