What's black, hairy, and full of hate? Hitler's moustache.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

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Woman:I give my Heart to You! Man:Thank You!!! The Woman then dies because one can't live without a heart

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Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They had several drinks, conversed animatedly, and heartily enjoyed themselves.

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So, there was two successful business men at a social gathering when one leans in to the other to comment, "Hey, that women over there, she looks like your wife!" to which the other one replies, "That is my wife."

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Why does Spongebob go to work? Because he's ready.

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If life gives you lemons, throw them at people.

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Why does Courtney smell? she has a severe lack of personal hygiene which needs addressing,

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Seven

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What's black and blue and afraid of sex The twelve year Old boy in my trunk

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What is the delicate way to start talking about your penis? ...that wasn't it.

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Which of the following is the biggest? A. 7 B. 17 C. 71 D. Yo mama

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What's black, white, and red all over? A penguin in a blender.

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Why did the mother get upset with her son? Because he sexually experimented with his cousin.

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Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

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What's worse than dying? Dying twice.

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what do you call an exited rectangle? an Erectangle

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What do you call it when a Priest, a Rabbi, and a Vicar meet for a drink at the bar? A social gathering.

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A man walks into a bar. He suffered concussions later that night.

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Why did the Elf stab the Gnome? Because I was on a bad acid trip.

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Why was the man sent to the hospital? He got crushed by a flying refrigerator.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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