How do you a baby into a small bowl? Put it in the blender. How to u get it out? Tostitos.

What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

A: Knock knock B: Who’s there? A: The police B: The police who? A: Ma’am, your son is dead.

Me: Knock Knock, Pornstar: Cum in.

Justin Bieber

why was the boy sad? his friend got hit by a bus.

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

170

Why was 15 afraid of 16? Coz 16 was bigger than him.

What happens when you stick your finger in a pencil sharpener? Blood everywhere.

How do you starve a Mexican? Deny him Food Stamps.

What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

So these two gay guys walk backwards into a bar.

if you read this you are gay

Why did the car stop? There was a fridge in the road

When is homework not homework? When it is turned into the teacher.

How do you keep a blonde busy? The best way to keep somebody busy is to make sure they have something to do, like get a job or a hobby or do some chores. The color of their hair is irrelevant.

Why did the boy punch his teacher? Muscle spasms.

1: Why did the chicken cross the road? 2: The chicken has a right to privacy, stop questioning what she does

What's worse than seeing your grandma naked. nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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