What's yellow and can not swim? A Bulldozer

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Reporter: So, how do you feel knowing you don't have some place to work when you walk out of your house because of that tornado? Guy: "Well, it feels even worse knowing I don't have a house to walk out of. . ."

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What's green and fluffy? Red fluff, if you're color blind.

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68

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There's an American, an African, and a Chinese walking down the street. Because the bar is down there.

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Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? I lost my tractor!

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What do you call a kid without brothers or sisters What? a chinese Boy!!!!!!! lol ;)

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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Uh, "Abel", seriously get over here and then get some sleep, not only did you get the code all wrong, there is no number to be deciphered at all, besides its called a laptop with a battery. Speaking of general dumbass... You have not changed the least, you really remind me of a cruel, sloppy, less disciplined (except the wise cracking thing Nero resorted to to push me away and apparently dodge gun fire, maybe his way of handling nerves. You might look like him, but personality wise you are completely different, cruel, sloppy, graphical, I mean did you ever see Nero get angry? I never did. That said Neo-Nero, you are a nice guy too, especially if you get here fast enough, I mean this place is freezing.

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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why couldn't the little girl play on the swing? Matty Russel was chasing her

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Who gave Max head georgia Hidi

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What did the midget say to the clown that was blocking the doorway? Excuse me

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Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

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Grammar ... the difference between knowing your shit, and knowing you're shit.

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What is black and gray? This rectangle and this text.

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What do a duck and a bike have in common? They both have handle bars except for the duck

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Yo mama so fat she sells shade. Yo mama so fat she needs cheat codes for wii fit. Yo mama so fat she in call of duty when a player kills her they get a 5 person kill streak. Yo mama so fat that she is fat. :)

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whats purple with fur?nothing mammals cannot have purple fur

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What did Sarah Palin say as she gazed to the West? "I really wish my daughter hadn't gotten pregnant."

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting rape.d by a giant scorpion.

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Why does Mike Tyson always win his fights? Because he hides in a refridgerator

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if japanese cars are called riceburners would german cars be called jewburners

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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