Why did the surrealist go to the doctor? Knock Knock.

Why did the dead baby cross the road? It didn't it's a dead baby!

what did the apathetic person say? Who Cares?

Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

im gunna build a lego house what shud i make it out of

what did Susie, the girl with no arms, say after she fell off the swing? nothing, she was killed on impact.

minorities.....

what do u say when u meet somebody new hello

Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was running away from KFC.

A African American male and a Mexican male are both in a car, who is driving? Most likely the owner or the car.

what did the stop sign say to the car? nothing.

This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

What's the difference between a black man and and a bag of crap? A lot, but mostly the bag

Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

A chemist and his buddy walk into a bar. The chemist, trying to sound smart, says, "I would like a glass of H20." The buddy, being a normal person who actually cares if he looks like an idiot, asks for plain water.

Why did Steve put his trumpet in the fridge? He had begun the early stages of dementia and was becoming increasingly confused and detached from reality. Also he was German.

A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

A Cheerio is at Cheerio high school, and there is another Cheerio that he wants to ask to the prom, but she is a frosted Cheerio and because of Cheerio social statuses she would not go with him. So he goes to the Cheerio factory so he can become a frosted Cheerio. The factory workers tell him that he can be a frosted Cheerio, but the machines are malfunctioning today and they can only frost half of him. He agrees, and the girl Cheerio goes to the prom with him. He shows up at the prom with her, and she asks him to get her some punch. So, he's walking around, looking for the punch line, when he realizes: There isn't any.

Why did the man commit suicide? Because on top of his depression, his wife had been cheating on him and his kids all died in a horrible hand-gliding mishap.

What did the black man watch basketball instead of Tennis? Because Basketball is a very popular sport to African Americans, and tests show they can just higher than Caucasians, Asians and Hispanics.

How old is your mom Dead

What would you do if the house you're sitting in now exploded? Nothing really, you would have died a horrible death.

Did you know that I can't talk any louder than this... Exept when I can

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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