A man decided to commit suicide. He did.

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What happened when the chicken crossed the road? The Farmer immediately noticed the oncoming car and flagged it down so the driver would stop and he could grab his chicken and carry it safely back to the coop

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What do you call a person mowing a lawn? A Mexican

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Have you seen the new Spiderman movie yet? No, Uncle ben hasn't seen it either.

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Ed Milliband looks like an amphibian.

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What did the quarter say to the dime? nothing.

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Knock! Knock! Who's There? The Police. Open the damn door. Nobody Is Home.

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why did the kid get home from school early cause he was home from school..

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Why little Susie often molested as a child? She was probably a good-looking child.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks him, "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, because horses cannot talk.

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i have a black person in my family tree he's still hanginh

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Man in Balcony: You're telling it wrong!

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Why do girls like nikki minaj? Because she raps good. -Avery Vartanian

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why did the chicken cross the road? to prove he could. Did it workout? NO

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Two gay guys walk into a bar. You think the second one would notice...

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what happened when a chicken laid an egg? it died

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into an orange and finding a worm.

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what do you get when you cross an elephant with a lake? swimming trunks.

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A Muslim man walks away from a populated area leaving his briefcase behind. After a few minutes he returns because he forgot his briefcase.

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A man is on an operating table. His heart stops beating and he suddenly finds himself at the Gates of Heaven. St. Peter approaches him. "Welcome, my son," St. Peter says. "I will ask you one question, and that will determine whether you can enter Heaven." The man nods nervously. St. Peter asks, "Did you ever commit a sin and never sought forgiveness?" The man thinks long and hard. "No, I always made sure to apologize." St. Peter smiles. "Congratulations, my son. You have passed the test, and may enter Heaven!" The man is ecstatic as the pearly gates open up for him. He enters Heaven and is astounded by its magnificent beauty. The man then loses all brain function and dies on the operating table.

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Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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A doctor walks into a bar. It's his day off and decides to celebrate after a long week of working.

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What did the ocean say to the black guy? Nothing, it just shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops