How do you know if your friend is dead? You shoot him in the face!

Q: Why did the cookie go to the doctor? A: Because he had brain cancer.

What did the man say when an pterodactyl flew into the kitchen while he was having breakfast? Huh, that's strange.

i quit soccer because science happened and then i forgot how to screw in a lightbulb

why did the black guy cross the street? to get to the package store.

What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

Q: What do you get when you throw a piece of bread in the oven? A: 6 million Jews

why did the chicken cross the road? he didn't make it

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

What did one pare say to the other ... ... WE MAKE A GREAT PARE!!!

once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

Why was the boy considered a bitch? His name was Jason Jubin

What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting r.aped by a giant scorpion.

Why didnt the boy go to school the next day? Because he killed himself due to bullying

why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

A man walks out of a bar. He didn't bring his driver's license, but managed to do a grand theft auto and unfortunately, crashed on the way home beacuse of a tree. Also, killed 12 people by car

What kind of shots I'd John take at night? Insulin, because he's a diabetic.

Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house she is likely to be there for some time.

Knock knock Who's there? Impatient Hellen Keller. Impatient Hellen Keller who? ...

THE END.

Why did Lindsay Lohan talk to her car? Because she's insane

Knock Knock! Come in the door is unlocked. I have cookies!

How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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