What do you call a car that is green? A Green Car.

Why did Harry get in the taxi? His mother told him to put his seatbelt on.

I hate it when i don't forward an email and then i die the next day.

How many eco-friendly people does it take to change a lightbulb? Nobody knows because fluorescent lightbulbs last 6 to 12 years longer than an incandescent lightbulb.

Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

A: Ask me if I'm a truck. B: Are you a truck? A: No.

Whats better than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown suit

you know somebody is lying when it IS opposite day.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

Yo mamma's so fat, she died of diabeties and we all mourn her loss.

Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no human can.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red-head are trapped on a desert island together After many days without food, they resort to cannibalism. The blonde eats the brunette, and the red-head eats the blonde. The red-head eventually dies once the water supply runs out.

What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid get on his birthday? Cancer.

Mary once had a boyfriend with a wooden leg; however, itt was a highly dysfunctional relationship, as the boyfriend was much too possessive of Mary. So Mary was forced to bring a close to the relationship.

One day, I was looking at my brand new wooden table, and I thought, "wow, that is a very nice brand new wooden table." And then my dog peed on it. I killed the dog.

What has feathers, and is known to fly? A bird

how do u piss of a polish man? rape his girlfriend

Well, as you know, I have alzheimers and... ... ... ... ... ... Well, as you know, I have alzheimers.

A man walks into a bar and has a wonderful time drinking with his friends, arrives home at a reasonable time and goes to bed.

What did the white cop say to the black thug? he didn't... he got shot before he could say anything

What's red and round? A red and round solid.

What's the difference between a Muslim and a box? A box won't blow you up!

boobs

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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