Yo mamma so fat We are all seriously concerned for her health

4 out of 4 questions. You want to cross the lake, but alligators live in that river. How do you get across? The alligators aren't there. They're all at the lion king's meeting.

why doesn't the werewolf like Ferrari's a werewolf being a mythical creature would most likely not have a preference as to what kind of car he drives because he would not exist

Did you hear about the plane that crashed and killed 1000 people? My sister has cancer.

your mothers so silly she saw a rock and sat on a chair.......?

Whats up with your nan? Copious amounts of lsd

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

Your mother is so fat that if she were to fall from a great distance she would hit the ground with more force than that of an average sized individual.

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

What did one wall say to the other? Nothing. Walls can't talk.

Guy 1: Hey, did you hear about this blind guy who went bungee jumping off a bridge? Guy 2: No, what happened? Guy 1: He couldn't see Jack!

Why do turtles walk slow? They are physically incapable of walking fast.

a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o q r s t u v w x y z i left out p.

Got Milk? Why yes! Yes I do!

What is the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family

A: Ask me if I'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

Yo momma is so stupid when she drove to Disney World she saw that said "Disney World Left" so she turned on her turn signal and made a left turn. She promptly arrived at Disney World but realized she had left her wallet at the hotel.

Did you hear about the kid-napping in Minnesota? He woke up

Who wants pizza crusts?

Listen pretty lady, NO WHAT WE HAVE BEEN DOING FOR LIKE SIXTEEN HOURS OR SOMETHING NON STOP STRAIGHT, IS VERBOTEN! Honestly, for me its a bit of a requirement, sure girls can go all like "But you are like friendzoned to me now", but then I... Hmm, you know, not a womanizer,my wife has the right word for it, I am a seducer.... Suddenly I do not like the sound of that, actually Its not a bit of a requirement, it is TOTALLY a requirement. Say, does it bother you when I mention my wife like at randomness?

While on a business trip, a Jim got a call on his cell phone. It was his best friend. He was informing Jim of his wife's death in a terrible train crash. She didn't die on impact, but her legs were cut off by metal debris from the train car in front of her. She fought against the pain and used a shirt she found from a dead body to stop the bleeding. She managed to drag herself to the nearest road crossing, where someone drove her to the hospital. Despite her efforts to survive and the surgeons efforts to save her, she died that night as a result of excessive blood loss. After he hung up, Jim turned up the ringer volume on his phone because he couldn't hear it very well when it rang.

it smells like up dog in here. whats that?

Two Iranians walk into an airport They show their passports and proceed to fly to their home in Minnesota

What did the man say to the woman he was in love with? Sure, I understand and I'm okay with being just friends.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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