How many dead babies does it take to paint the side of a building? I don't know, it depends on how hard you throw them.

Q: whats the fastest way to a woman's heart? A: A knife to the ribs...

The asian boy only did an hour of study....... nothing was heard of him after his mum found out

What time is it when a cow walks into your house? The time that your mother arives.

Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

What's worse than getting a fly stuck up your nose? Been alone in a hospital room with Jimmy Saville.

Roses are red Violets are blue Actually they're purple That's why they're called "violets"

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he fell off a cliff

Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

Why can't we see the wind? Because no one likes you...

How do you do to stop a baby who is circling? You nail his other feet.

Why did the dinosaurs die out? Because you touch yourself at night.

What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

What's worse than having cancer? Two people having cancer

A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

what happened to the kid who didn't get what he wanted for his birthday? He committed suicide

what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

What did the man say when he lost his phone? Answer: I lost my phone!!

Roses are red Violets are blue I like you Get in the van

Two Jews walk into a bar. They promptly order their drinks and then leave.

Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

Aodhan peanut head Hearty

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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