why'd the chicken cross the road? he didn't what kind of farmer lets their chickens out on the streets, they get crunk you know

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

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What do you call the fear of anteaters? Stupid.

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What do you call a man with bananas in his ears? A doctor. He is clearly mentally unstable, and probably in pain.

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out of the chambers...

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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What do u call a Mexican on the moon? An astronaut. What do u call all the Mexicans on the moon? Problem solved!!!

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What's worse than loading babies into a garbage truck. Answore: unloading them with a pitch fork.

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Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

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Is your refrigerator running? no then your food is probably beginning to rot

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Q: What do you call a half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building? A: A half-black, half-hispanic man crashing a plane full of innocent people into a building.

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What's green, and looks like money? Money...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because people have encroached on it's natural habitat.

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Why can't Demetrius swim? Because he has a genetic disorder where he is paralyzed from the waste down, so he is therefore incapable of propelling himself through the water

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have alzheimer's, cheese on toast

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Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a bag of dead babies. I don't have a Ferrari in garage.

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If 32x=8600, find x. ^ | There it is!

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What is the difference between a dead baby and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Me.

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops