A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

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Whats the difference between Amanda and Brittaney spears? Nothing, they are both worthless sluts

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Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

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Girl: Want to stay over at mine tonight? Guy: Yeah I'd love to! Girl: Tough, you can't

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my gave me a game i said thank you

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What did the boy with no srms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Knock knock Who's there? Illiteracy.

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Patient: Doctor Doctor I think I have HIV! Doctor: Wtf to that one...

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How do you drop a raw egg on to the floor without cracking it? Any way you want, it is very hard to crack concrete.

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What did the lamp say to the pencil? Nothing. Lamps and pencils are inanimate objects and are also non sentient so therefore are incapable of talking or listening or having any emotions.

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What did the pimp do to his bitch? He thanked her and rewarded her for her years of dedication and preserverance

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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Q. have you seen Helen Keller house A. niether has she

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why did the chicken cross the road? Does it matter why, it just did.

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what's the difference between a male and female skeleton? The jaw bone structure

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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5 little monkeys jumping on the bed, one fell off and bumped his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "He has a mild concussion."

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Your momma's so broke she might be eligible for government assistance. Seriously she should totally look into it.

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Why did the dude fall? Because he tripped over a stick.

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Your momma's so fat: She feels excluded by mainstream clothing outlets.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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