potatoes

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What's worse than breaking your leg and not being able to walk? Breaking your neck because you will most likely not be able to walk from the high probability of being paralyzed for the rest of your life.

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Q. What do you get when you cross the North Korean border and an American? A. Death.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

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I had a friend named Joshua, he died of AIDs, cancer, and several other diseases.

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But I like being mean and angry! Nevermind, 158 according to Mensa`s standard bullshit test (my wife got 160, I remember we argued a lot over it because I kept insisting they would not use the same predictable pattern again... I overestimated them wildly I can make more advanced stuff than they can, and in no way do I consider myself "The worlds elite required to ensue the future survival and salvation of mankind`s finest and fittest" those fucking arrogant suckers,,,) Below average in any test including American presidents and historical events. Aaand about 450 in any bullshit online test which then offers you "more accurate tests" which cost money and probably destroys the fake confidence any idiot buying such a test in the first place might have built up,

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What was the leg less and armless mans favorite type of music? Nubstep

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Whats the easiest way to get a dumb blond to have sex with you? rape.

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Why did greg come to America? Because he wanted visit the states

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This little pig went to market, This little pig stayed at home, This little pig had pork chops, And this little pig was GONE...

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Q: How do u make a butcher cry A: Kill its family

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Now that I'm of age to go clubbing, I feel sorry for the seals.

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two pigs in a bath one says to the other can you pass me the soap..the other replies..do I look like a typewriter!?

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How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

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What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

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Nickleback walks into a bar..... There isn't a punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

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A man walks into a bar and says "ow"; he stepped on a nail sticking up through one of the floorboards. He then sues the bartender for a large sum of money because of the injury he sustained, and causes the bartender to lose everything he owns in order to pay off his debt.

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Why is it sad that a black guy died in a car crash He was my friend

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Q: what do you call a black priest A: Coley s**t

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Hey do you want to hear the joke about my d**k?? I cant tell it because it's to long

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could get back before curfew.

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Why did the cat throw up on the couch? because it was nauseous!

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You write a really difficult riddle in braille and tell her to solve it.

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Knock, knock -Who's there? Help -Help who? Im dying of lukemia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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