"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

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Luke Hardie is G@Y

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An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window, at the 122th floor of a skyskraper.

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What do you get when you mix a burrito and an earthworm? Diaherea

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Whats worse than finding a giant spider in your bedroom? Loosing it...

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An Irish man walks past a bar... it could happen...

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two men walked into a bar the last one ducked

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

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How come anti jokes r funny

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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That moment when you try and finger your girlfriend and there no hole......and you start questioning your sexuality

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.sdrawkcab siht gnidaer era ouy ,siht daer nac ouy fI

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Why did the boy get hit by the ice cream truck? The driver of the ice cream truck was drunk

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Whats the similairity between a dog and a cat? They're both cats, except for the dog.

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Are you related to Yoda? because yoda-licious!!!!

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Roses are red violets are blue if you were number one I"ll pick number two, if you were number two then I'll pick POO!

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Why wasn't the girl asked to the prom? Because she had cerebral palsy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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