What did the disabled boy get on Christmas morning? Cancer.

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Why did the gambler sell his house? Because he needed money to pay for male hookers.

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how do you scare a mexican? You dress up as a bar of soap.

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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What do you do on Mother's Day? This is not a joke, I don't know what to do.

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A Priest, Rabbi, and a Minister walk into a bar... i forgot the rest of the joke, but your mothers a whore!

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Your mommas so fat, that she's really big.

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What do you do if you see an alien landing? This depends entirely on the circumstances under which the landing takes place. It also depends on the observed nature of the alien,but given the high unlikelihood of this occurrence, one may be safe in the knowledge that he or she will never have to deal with such a mental state of stress.

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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How many Jews foes it take to screw in a lightbulb? 1...like... I'm confused that you... I mean screwing in a lightbulb isn't that hard.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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How do you keep an elephant from charging? Shoot it with a high powered gun right between the eyes.

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Knock, Knock. Who's there? It's the police, they ask the questions.

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ask me if im deaf. are you deaf? ...............

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How do you fit a whale into a truck bed? You can't, whales live in the ocean.

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Some black guy grabs a white guys wallet. the black guy says " hey I think you dropped this"

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What's small, black,and crispy? A baby after an apartment fire

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Why did the blonde put tip-ex on the computer screen? To spite her physically abusive husband

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What did Delaware? A coat.

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Eats shoots and leaves Pandas. If you can't figure this out then you're probably 12

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Your Grandma and your mom drove off a cliff, who survived? Both of them, they didn't drive off a cliff.

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Why did the girl fall off of her highchair? Her father threw an axe at her.

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So there are two skunks in a bath tub. One of the skunks says to the other, "Would you please pass the soap?", and the other skunk says, "What do you think I am, a talking radio?!"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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