Where do fat girls go to eat doughnuts? Jenny Craig

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have 5 fingers The third one is for you

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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What's black and can't climb trees? A parking lot

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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why did the asian go to the bar? they were told they could drive better when drunk how much worse could they get

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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a man is running away

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A cannibal went for a walk and he passed his brother.

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Why did the robot cross the road? Because it was a banana.

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david your girlfriend has a nice ass

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What do you call a guy and two girls are at the bottom of the ocean? A guy and two girls at the bottom of the ocean.

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Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

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knock knock who's there? John Oh, come in then

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What does Tourettes Syndrome have in common with short term memory loss? I DON'T FREAKING REMEMBER.

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Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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Boy:well you merry me. Girl:no Boy: why not? Girl:becuase you're rapeing me

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What has 3 legs? An abnormal human.

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What did the lady find out when she went to the doctor. She had breast cancer.

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Your Mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops