A farmer was robbed and complained to the sheriff's department that he suspected it was a black man behind the crime. "How do you know this for sure?" The sheriff asked him. He replied, "I chased him into the night, it was dark and I couldn't see him"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dream of a day when chickens won't be questioned about their actions

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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What is worse than finding an Apple in your Worm? Watching your dog jumping of a cliff

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Jesus was a good guy

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How did the man with no legs get around? He was assisted by a nurse or relative who was kind enough to take on such a task.

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What would be worse than the Holocaust? 2 Holocausts.

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Whats the same about Jerry Seinfeld and Adam Sandler They are both comedians

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Life is like a box of chocolates! It sucks if you have diabetes

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Have you heard about the hipster paleontologist? He liked dinosaurs better when they were underground.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was wandering because he was lost and got hit by a car in the process.

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"knock knock" "Come in"

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How did the man die? He was killed alive.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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Why are plants green? Plants are green due to the chloroplast organelles found in their cells. These membrane bound organelles are exclusive to plant cells and are used to convert sun light to usable chemical energy. This energy is stored in the form of ATP molecules, or adenosine triphosphate. When one of the three phosphate groups of an ATP molecule is removed, the molecule releases the energy put into this bond and becomes ADP, or adenosine diphosphate. Throughout this process, the organelle fulfills its sole function and at the same time gives plants their green color our eyes perceive today.

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-if you're American in the kitchen, British in the living room, what are you in the bathroom? -in the bathroom.

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Whats Yellow and has arms. A lemon i lied about the arms.

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Why can't Tom Maynard play cricket anymore Because he's dead

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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How do you kill an Asian? Poke him with a large fork until hes dead.

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and a rock? The rock doesn't cheat on it's wife.

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man returned and said, "My friend does not have a pulse and he is not breathing, so I stand by my prior assumption."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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