Q; What is pink and has 2 legs? A: Not a lot of things, but a Flamingo is the closest thing that I could think of if you do not count the beak eyes and feet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Most likely to get to a source of food or escape a predator.

You know whats worse than getting punched in the face? Getting kicked in the balls.

What do Ethiopians do at night? Starve

Why did the chicken kill himself? Because he was bullied as a child and is now suicidal

Knock, knock Who's there? Man Man who? The man who is knocking. Now open the door Carl!

What's the best way to get gum out of your hair? Cancer

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was an identity thief.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

Why did the little girl fail her test? Because she had mental retardation.

the man the invented it doesnt want it, the man that wants it doesnt need it, and the man the needs it doesnt know it....what is it? a coffin.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dog

How many fingers does Charlie Sheen have? 8. and 2 thumbs. just like most everybody else.

Jimmy went to a bar, to see a stand up comedian, he heard the standup comedian tell a funny joke, so after the show, he went home and told his wife the joke and after that he said, i made that up, im funny arent i, the wife seemed shifty, so she googled the joke and found the stand up comedians joke, giggled and then proceeded to continue back angrily to Jimmy, because he just did the wrong thing, she slapped Jimmy in the face, divorced Jimmy and killed his 3 children because Jimmy plagurised, and plagurism is illegal, and now Jimmy has no children, and a red mark on his cheek and knows he did the wrong thing don't smoke kids

What did the explorer say to the new species Oh look it says squirtle let's call it squirtle Oh look it say woof let's call it poochyena

There's two people, one wearing a nice sweater and the other is not. The one without has to walk the dog, so he asks the other guy if he can have his sweater. He says "No but you can wear it."

How many Jews can you fit in a car? I don't know it really depends on the car, usually about 2 in the front, 3 in the back and... That's about it

Why was the child lying in the scrap yard? because he was being torn apart by guard dogs.

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

What is blue and not heavy? Light blue!

It is so hard to write an antijoke.

Q: what did the nazi say to the other nazi A: hallo

What do you call something that has two legs, arms and is bloody all over? My ex's new boyfriend.

Q: What dosent a Jew and a pizza have in commen? A: The pizza dosent scream when you put it in the oven.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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