Doctor, I am afraid of getting sexually abused. Hmm, sounds serious, take off all your clothes so we can get a proper look.

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I called your friend gay and he hit me with his fist because he was angry at me for using gay in a derogatory way.

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After tesco's horse burgers, what's next? My lidl pony

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a man shoots his mother in-law He his charged with murder and will only be eligible for parole in 18 months

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A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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Where do you find a dog? At a pet store.

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Q: Where can you find a cat with no arms and no legs? A: Right where you left him Q: Where can you find a dog with no arms and no legs? A: In a bun

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If a girl sleeps with 20 guys, she's a slut. If a guy does the same... He's Gay.

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Q: What did the farmer say when he coudn't find his tractor? A: "where's my tractor?"

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a bed? A: The victim of a serious car accident in a hospital bed.

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Don't you sometime just want to chop of your toes and stomp around to prove to the so called 'experts' that it is possible for a person to walk without toes? . . . . . . me neither

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke her face

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what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

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What killed the name cool? Coolio

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when the teacher asked jimmy if he was a girl jimmy felt very scared because his teacher had no mental problems.

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Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

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how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

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What happened to the man who lost his left arm, left leg and eye in an accident? I expect he claimed insurance, assuming he was prudent enough to insure himself, or his workplace complied with legislation.

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Sarah Palin

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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How many jews can you fit into a car? 2 in the front, 2 in the back, and a thousand in the ash tray.

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What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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