She said no

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Bloody kids ...

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What's white and likes to likes to take frequent jogs? Stephen Hawkings, I meant so say remain motionless

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Q. What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A. Robin, get in the car.

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Roses are Red, Blues are Violets, Have I Dyslexia, F**k.

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A homosexual walks into a church

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A man rode into town on Friday and stayed a while and then left on Friday how did he manage this?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To avoid the avoid the nuclear bomb at hiroshima

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Why did the grandmother lock her grandson in the closet? Because she didn't love him.

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Q: Whats the difference between a friend and a bestfriend? A: The other one has best in front of it dumb A$$

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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A fat man and his dog walk into a bar...the man buys a beer and walks out

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What did the Penis say to the Condom? Nothing. The human organ is not able to talk to another inanimate object, therefore it's impossible.

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doctor doctor i have been having a sore head recently . doctor : have you hurt your head yes

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Your momma's so fat that she has a body fat percentage of 37 and is clinically overweight.

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A blonde and a brunette are stuck on a desert island, they later died of starvation.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

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What is pink, smelly, and sometimes gets wet? A pink sponge.

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Why was the little boy crying? Because a stranger shoved explosives up his butthole.

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Why are black people black? They're not. They're brown you idiot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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what does the homeless man do when he gets home? nothing, he's homeless

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There are four worms walking in a straight line. The first worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me!" The second worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The third worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" The fourth worm says, "Hey, there's a worm walking behind me, too!" How can this be? ...the fourth worm lied!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops