once upon a time, a bird fell in love with a fish.. they both died.

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What's spotty, can be found everywhere and is largely unpopular? Nothing.

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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Yo momma's so poor, that when she went to the soup kitchen, she got food.

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Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

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if i had a nickel for every time iv typed an anti joke... i would have $0.15

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Roses are red Violets are blue If you came 'cause GameGrumps Fuck you.

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So, there's a lion loose in Colchester. Should've gone to Specsavers... [L]

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A man calls 911 911: hello? Man: sorry wrong number.

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why did the building fall down the terrorists came back

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Whats the best ab workout? Solly Twist

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Wanna here a joke? Feminism.

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There are 3 poeple on an air plane. The pope, a boy scout, and barak obama. The plane is about to crash and there is only 2 parachutes. omba said im the president of the united states and one of the worlds smartest african americans so he jumped out. The Pope told the boy scout " i lived a long happy life you take the last parachute and jump." The boy scout replied what there are still 2 left the " worlds smartest negro jumped out with my backpack.

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Why did Alex die? He choked on a semi truck

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

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Woman Rights

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Take off your shoes.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? I go bird hunting. Kelvin Yang

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There's two homosexuals having sex in the back of a van...........they're over 21 what's wrong with that!

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick

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Nobody enjoys your company. Nobody likes your work. Nobody loves you. There is no person who's name is legitimately nobody.

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theres a mexican women and a black man in a car....whos driving? nobody sadly the driver was shot.

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Q: How do you stop a skunk from smelling? A: Lethally inject it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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