Q. What do you call cheese that's not yours? A. Stolen, you're under arrest.

How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

What trees do fortune tellers look at? Whichever variety of species are indigenous to where they live.

Why did the Billy flunk the test? His parents were killed in a refridgerator

Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

Is that a baby in your carriage or are you just happ..... WTF. WHERES ITS EYES!? **purges**

More mindfuck: Your school is betraying you edition. How are you going to feel good about yourself, if you have to UNDER STAND everything you learn? Moral: If you dont get it, you are not ready.

Yo Mama So Fat ... She Look Like Dis ///(*<>*)\\\ | | | | <=> <=>

stinky boner

person: Knock knock. Me: Who's there? person: A Hipster. Me: False.

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Why did the black man die? He was shot

Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock! Who's there? The chicken

A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

Theres this guy that got pulled over and the guy in the car said: I have AIDS the cop said: Oh, really when did you get them? I don't have AIDS

whats long and pointy and guys always have to brag about whos got the biggest one? their christmas trees

What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

What has four wheels, two wings, and flies? A bird...I was kidding about the wheels.

What happened to the boy who ditched his friends and lied to them...? His appendix exploded.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOUR MOM! Me: -is dead.

Your mother is so obese, that when shot with a high velocity round from a handgun, the bullet is unlikely to penetrate the several layers of fat protecting her vital organs, like a fleshy kevlar vest. However, she is likely to die from infection, which is highly commom among gunshot wounds.

How come Hellen keller is blind and deaf? Cause she is a women.

The Game

Dave: My wife just gave birth! The baby is doing good. John: You mean doing well?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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