Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

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What do you get if you buy a big mac with a ten pound note? Change.

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Why is a budgie Because the other leg is yellow

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Knock knock. Racism.

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Why can't dinosaurs talk? Because they are all dead.

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A man met a genie that granted him three wishes. I wish I could fly. The genie gave him a plane ticket. No, I want to really fly for real! The genie put him inside a plane. Okay, I wish I was unable to die then! The genie killed him. Moral: Not every story needs to make a fucking sense.

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Jim: "Hey guess what" Bill: "What" Jim: "George Bush got reelected" *Bill proceeds to throw himself into the Atlantic Ocean.*

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Why was the little girl sad? Because she was brutally raped up the ass

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i just got all five seasons of big bang theory in the mail for xmas... i'm divorcing my wife.

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How do u bring a dead person to life? U dont.

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Michael Castillo is gay

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What did the man do after he rented a movie? He watched it

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There was a girl who had a dream of becoming a famous movie star. So, after five years of hard work and dedication, she didn't become a famous movie star. Dreams don't always come true. Refrigerators keep things cold.

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What's funnier than the world ending? Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder in a staring contest.

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Spinabifita

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violets are red my name is bob this poem makes no sense microwave

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What's worse than a dead baby? 2 dead babies

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why did the little girl fall out of the tree? She didnt have any arms

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Compton

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Q. Whats green jumps up and down and then red? A.A frog in a mixer

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What is black and white and red all over? A Zebra that has been fatally maimed by a hungry lion.

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A boy with cancer decides to go skydiving for his 18th bithday. Unfortunately, his parchute doesn't work & he dies before he hits the ground.

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Aodhan peanut head Hearty

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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