why did the chicken cross the road? because it wanted to get to the other side! why did the chipmunk cross the road? because it was stapled to the chicken

What is the difference between a black man and a white man? The pigment in their skin.

What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

Did you hear about the mail man without a mail truck? He walked

1 little monkey jumping on the bed, he fell off and hit his head. Momma called the doctor and the doctor said, "Your son died of a concussion."

Why did the turkey cross the road? His friend, the chicken, had just been hit by a passing car.

What did the banker say to the other banker? We're both bankers!

nick biggs ate a car well his name is nick BIGGS

Your momas so fat her doctor put her on a diet plan.

An orange walks into a bar....orange you glad I didn't say banana?!?!

THAT MAN EATS TOO MUCH. therefore he is overweight.

What is a dead cat on the side of the road. A free cat.

Got tired of McDonalds Jim?

Why can't Hellen Kelller drive? Because she's a woman.

What do you call a yelling, enraged Asian man? A fucking asshole.

What goes down well with whiskey? Pedestrians

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is a woman.

Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

When's the best time to go to the dentist? There is no best time, it is based on personal opinion and depending whether or not you have a conflicting schedule

A black man walks up to the cashier with twenty buckets of KFC and seventeen gallons of grape Kool - Aid. The cashier says, "Do you want a bag for those?"

1 + 1 = 3

Knock Knock Who's there? Not Michael Jackson!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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