What do you call a man who buys flowers, chocolates, and new jewelry for his wife? A kind, considerate husband.

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Who took the last can of soda? I dunno.

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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Knock Knock Whos there Who Yan Who Yan Who Chow Yan Chow

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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President Donald Trump

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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Tony Romo

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Knock Knock Sorry, I'm in a full body cast and can't answer the door.

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Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

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whats small and tickles? pubic lice

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A man is in the desert and he finds a lamp, he rubs the lamp and out comes a genie! The genie says "I can grant your three wishes, for releasing me from the lamp" The man says "I wish I didn't have AIDS".

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why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

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It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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what do you get when you cross a scotsman who doe'snt know anything about football,and a indian who doe'snt anything about football .blackburn rovers , and a good night out.

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Dad, they tell me I am a slowpoke at school, what can I do? ... Eh son, this is mommy, your dad died ten years ago remember?

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Your grandma and your mom drove of a cliff, who survived? Both of them they didn't drive off a cliff

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Q: What happened when Johnny cheated on his test? A: He got a higher score

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why is john so fat years of over eating

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A. Knock Knock. B. Who's there? A. Orange. B. Orange who? A. Orange you glad your retarded because you think oranges can talk?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops