What do you call cheese that is not yours? The fact that you do not own the cheese doesnt change its name

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Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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What did the guy who killed Osama Bin Laden say? Burn!

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Why couldn't the young pirate get in to the movie? Because he wasn't old enough.

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Q: What has eyes but can't see, has arms but no hands and legs but no feet A: a blind man with his hands and feet amputated with cancer

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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The skeleton walks into a bar. Everyone is confused and leaves.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Ryan O'Sullivan likes to suck his own penis. - Ryan O'Sullivan.

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What did the blonde do when her car broke down? Made a Facebook status about then called animal control.

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Ebola

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

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In the middle of a long flight from Heathrow to Chicago O'Hare, the passengers of a 747 watched the engines all suddenly flame out. "Now, folks," the captain said over the PA as the plane plummeted to the earth, "I want it on record that I said it in plain English: a 747 can't fly from Heathrow to Chicago without refueling." No one bothered writing it down.

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hi michael

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What did the mother get at the grocery store? Food.

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Why are there no swimming pools in Mexico? The average yearly income is $3,523, and pool chemicals are very expensive.

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Yeah right loser!

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What does Snoop dog wash his clothes with Bleach

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what do you do when you see a black man getting hitted by a Mexican taxi? -Call 911

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What do you call a white woman that had sex with a black guy? A rape victim.

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What's the difference between you and a mallet with a cold? Ones a sick duck...I forget what I was about to say but your mother is a whore

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Women's rights

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A black guy, a Latino guy and an Asian guy all walk in a bar. What do they all have in common? Believe it or not, they all liked cantaloupe.

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penis

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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