Why did the chicken cross the road ? To get to the other side . Unfortunately , there was a car accident and shrapnel from the explosion [caused by gas on fire] cut his head off causing the old woman to faint , and later die a horrible death .

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How do you stop a bird from flying? Shoot it with a harpoon gun.

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Why did the mother cross the road? To find her dead baby that was hit the night before.

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69- by Adam Chebali

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They found Michael Jackson dead in his house and found Madeleine McAnn in the cupboard 8P

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Q: Why can't white people dunk? A: because they can't jump high enough

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You know what helps with back pain? If you lick my butt hole.

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What's black, blue, and red all over? A baby after I kill it

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"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

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How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

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Q: what do you call a drunk blond? A: a cab

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What do squirrels and Justin bieber have in common? Everything.

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Knock Knock.. Who's There? Boo.. Boo Who? Book...

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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You must be Jamaican cause you have long dreadlocks and you are listening to Bob Marley

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What did Helen Keller name her children? Nothing, since she didn't have any.

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How many retarded mexicans can you fit in a smart car? Two.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a dick just for you

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A lady forgot to feed her goat. When she went to feed it, It wasn't there. Why? She didn't have a goat. Another lady forgot to feed her cat. When she went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? It died 2 days earlier. A man forgot to feed his cow. When he went to go feed it, it wasn't there. Why? They had ate it for dinner last night. A teenage boy forgot to feed his hamster. When he went to feed it, it wasn't there. Why? He spent so much time playing video games that it ate itself. So the boy had his mom make him a sandwich.

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There are two types of people in this world: those who can count and those who can't. I happen to be one of those who can.

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Lard and Liz lard,lard and Liz

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An Irishman, an American, an Australian, a Chinese man, a Turk, a Brazillian, a Canadian, a Jew, an African, a German, a Mexican, a Norweigian, a Swede, a Spaniard, a Russian and an Indian walk into a bar.

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John: Hey Pablo why are you standing outside Home Depot. Pablo: Because I work here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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