Roses are red Violets are blue Does this cloth smell like chloroform to you!

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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Why is John gay? Because he enjoys the penis

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My mate mated with my mate's mate. mated of course meaning fucked.

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"It smells like up dog in here." "What's up dog?" "Not much, what's up with you?"

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why did the imagrant cross the road the cops were on his tail for false identity of the chicken

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was the World Chicken Road Crossing Competition.

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a duck walks into a bar. he sits by another duck and says duck 1: Quack!! duck 2: I was just about to say that! duck 1: No way! duck 2: Seriously! duck 1: We are so a-like. duck 2: totally!

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They were baked until the baker them until they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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This is not a joke

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What do you call a man who has Alzheimer's? Wait what am I doing?

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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m-BD0nWgoIw

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What rude names do you call a girl with no limbs? Anything you want they can't touch you

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why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it tried but was hit by a truck at the halfway point.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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A Sloth runs...

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It's fun for you and me, that's why they call it OCD It's easy as 1..2.... Hey look a butterfly!

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Tony Romo

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whats small and tickles? pubic lice

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why was the man's arm bleeding? Because he just got shot in the arm...

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Doctor: Knock knock... Patient: Who's there? Doctor: Interrupting doctor... Patient: Interrupting doct-- Doctor: You have cancer.

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What do you look for in a woman? a pulse.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops