A woman walked into the doctors office with a black eye. The doctor asked: How did you get that? The woman said: I fell.

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Yo momma so fat she has more chins the china town

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What did the little boy with cancer say right before he died? Nothing. He was very sick, and could not speak during the last few weeks of his life.

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How did Jimmy get into the R movie? He bought a ticket.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Why do Iraqi women never sleep with American soldiers? Because Americans always talk about pulling out but they never do!

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- Hey, guess how many people are dead in that cemetery? - I don't know. How many? - All of them.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted tobe cool, But I look like you

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How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

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Why did the black person cross the road? Because the street light turned green

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Customer: "I can't turn my computer on." Phone support: "Do you have power?" Customer: "Yes." Phone support: "Do you have fingers?" Customer: "No."

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A dolphin walks into a bar. Dolphins do not have legs therefore this is physically impossible.

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Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

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A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

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What's green, has four legs, and falls out of a tree? A pool table in a tree

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Yo momma so fat, when she steps on the scales it reads 90kg

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What do you call a black pilot? A niigger

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Why can't the boy ride his bike to school? It has no wheels.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It got shot. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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What is it called when a whole bunch of black people run down a hill? A race.

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A hooker walks into a bar. She orders a few drinks and leaves. She's a man.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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