A man adopts an orphan. He waits till the child is a teenager to tell the news. He then commits suicide as to scar the child emotionally for the rest of its life.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&Ms factory? Because she slapped the boss when he made a pass at her. Afterwhich she reported the incident to her Union and the boss was fired for Sexual Harassment. She was then rehired with a substantial increase in salary.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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a blond was walking across a river thinking how do I get across. when she saw another blond. and asked how do I get to the other side and the other said your already on the other side.

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What did the collage professor say to the plumber? Hi.

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Why wasn't the drunk driver arrested when he killed a man? Because he died as well.

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Why Did the one handed man cross the road? To get to the dying man on the other side

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How many cats get hit by a car per day How ever many cats you can find

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What do u call a man with no arms and no legs and is laying in front of a door? Matt

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I ponder

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Why? Whats wrong?

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Is that a threat or a promise? dragonflies

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where wally? wallys a myth.

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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A Muslim walks into a bomb shop. Unfortunately for the bomb shop owner, the Muslim was a police officer. He proceeded to arrest the owner and the employees of the store, as it turned out that the selling of these particular explosive devices were illegal. They ended up in jail, and justice was served.

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Why is NO ONE on Facebook when I AM?! Because you have no friends... on Facebook... ... Wow.

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poop

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Doctor: "I'm sorry, but your son has Hepatitis B. Asian Parent: "Why he has Hepatitis B? Why he not get the Hepatitis A plus?"

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how much wood can a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood three wood

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse doesn't respond because its a horse and cant speak or understand english and gallops out of the bar knocking over a few tables and stools.

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Women's rights

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Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Anal

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A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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