Where do you live? In a house

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Hi? No!!!!!

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Person 1: Ask me if i'm an orange.. Person 2: Are you an orange? Person1: No..

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antijoke is the best website.

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So this old redneck is sitting on his porch when he sees this boy walking down the road and hollers "What you got there boy?" "Chicken wire." "What you gonna do with that?" "Gonna catch me some chickens." The old guy thought: Dumb boy. You can't catch no chickens with chicken wire. Later that evening he sees the same boy walking with a bunch of chickens. The next day he sees the same boy walking with duct tape. "What you got there boy?" "Duct tape" The boy replies. "Gonna catch me some ducks." The old man leaned back and thought. "Dumb boy, you can't catch ducks with duct tape." Later that evening he sees the boy walking with a bunch of ducks. The next day he sees the same boy and hollers: "What you got there boy?" "I got me some pussy willow." The old man hollers: "Hold on, let me get my hat."

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What is dark, funny looking, black, and rhymes with osama? A black lama.

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What do you call a black guy with a peg leg? An amputee.

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What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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If life gives you lemons, don't accept them because you have a citrus allergy.

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So there was a blond, a brunette, and a red-head. They walked out of the salon very happy with their respective dye jobs.

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why do black people hate school? because they have to sit and learn like the rest of us for hours on end

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What was jesus's first miracle? He made a blind man walk. And for the stupid people out there jesus's first supposed miracle was making a cripple Walk

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Me:hey paul did you see that story on the news? Paul:ya i did thats really crazy!

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Why are reading anti-jokes so funny? Im not sure, i just read them and laughter ensues.

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A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

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What kind of jokes to dairy farmers tell? Corny jokes.

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What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

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Well educated black man.

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Timmy's mom is an alcoholic. His dog is asleep in the backyard. Timmy asks his mother, "Why is our dog sleeping?" His mother replies, "It's not sleeping, its dead."

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What do you call a black man with a PhD and loving family? A nigger

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When your scuba diving why do u jump off backwards beacause if u jump forwards than u witll still be in the boat!!!!!!

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what did the girl who's father was murdered do at her wedding? not have a father daughter dance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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