If i could rearrange the alphabet I wouldn't put U and I together. I'd put my dick in your mouth.

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What do you call a young man holding a banana? Well, this joke had quite a good ending, but as this site only has anti jokes I am going to change the ending. Because he wanted to eat it.

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How do you confuse a blond? Begin talking to her about a subject that's not in her field of expertise using complicated technical verbiage and jargon.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? There was a huge pile of dead babies blocking his path.

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What do you call an elephant on the moon? Dead.

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Person 1: Knock knock Person 2: Who is there??? Person 1: ..................................... Person 2: (Opens Door) Person 1: BOO i scared u and ding dong ditched u Person 2: Actually "Ding Dong Ditching" is when a one or more human beings search for a targeted house where they ring the door bell and run to a designated location to hide. After the resident opens the door to find out no one has stayed and waited, they close the door and the human beings quickly run up and repeat the task many as times until the resident finally catches them.

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Why did the boy laugh? Because someone told him a joke.

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This one sucks!

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What has two arms and two legs? A human being.

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http://www.dafk.net/what/

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why did the kid let go of his kite? He got struck by lightning

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Q. What do humans and jelly beans have in common ? A. Nothing.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Whats white and can kill you if it falls out of a tree? A refridgerator

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How did the blonde girl get pregnant? Sperm enters their vagina and fertilizes an egg cell causing a child to be conceived.

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How do you stop a black guy from drowning? Take your foot off his head.

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A whale's vagina

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a horse is running across a cliff at 54 miles per hour, against the wind. he has been running for three hours. he needs to run for 347 more kilometers before he is tired. the wind is blowing at a speed of 10 miles per hour... he wonders if he will make it when suddenly he falls off the cliff. why did he fall of the cliff? it was a retarded horse.

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Maturity is a virtue.

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What did the Catholic Priest say to the young boy? God bless you.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, the face like yours belongs to the zoo. Please don't be sad, 'cos I'll be there too.. Not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Q: whats worse than a Muslim? A: a Jew

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What is worst than a black guy hanging on a tree. A burnt black guy hanging on a tree

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his tricycle? He was run over by a bus.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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