A terrorist walks into a bomb shop. He soon realizes he's in the wrong shop, leaves and goes on with his day.

What's beauitful and disgusting at the same time? Menstration. Jk it's just disgusting.

"What time is it?" "Time to buy a watch." The homeless man inquiring about the time proceeded to cry.

An boy with ADHD walks into a

I'd like to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather did. Not screaming in terror like the rest of te people in his car.

What did the gay man say to the deaf man? I don't know, I can't hear.

Ask me if I am a tree. Are you a tree? No.

An Iraqi, an American and an Irishman get on a plane. They all enjoy the in-flight amenities, agree that the food was sub-standard and arrive at their destinations safely.

What's the difference between dogs and humans? 8.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on the front porch? Matt What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a hole? Phil What do you call a man with no arms and no legs floating down the river? Bob

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

"You've got a lot of C in your body." said the doctor. Jimmy replied with glee: "Ah that's great news, vitamin C is.." "No you've got Hepatitis C, you'll be dead within a month."

Wanna hear a funny joke? Look at the last joke.

Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

What do you call a pig with one eye? A pig.

Once upon a cross

An Englishman, an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar. They have trouble understanding each other.

Nicolas Cage's acting.

Why couldn't little Jessica open the door? It was locked

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was a woman. Why couldn't hellen Keller have fun at the zoo? She was blind and deaf.

Knock Knock! Whose there? Adolf Hitler

Whatsthe best way to kill a blonde? Tell her theres a scratch and sniff at the bottom of the pool.

how many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? one and a ladder

Your mother is so stupid that she has an IQ score that is much lower than the average person.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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