A priest, rabbi, and mormon are arguing about which religion is best. A zookeeper hears and says, "I have a bear who is sleeping right now. How about whoever converts the bear belongs to the best religion?" The priest goes in first, and then walks out a few minutes later, unharmed. The mormon does the same, and he too exits unscathed. The rabbi goes in, and walks out covered in claw marks. "How'd it go?" Said the zookeeper. "Easy." Said the priest. "I just sprinkled some Holy water on him." "I did the same." Said the mormon. The rabbi looked at the zookeeper and said, "have you ever tried to circumcise a bear?"

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this sentence will not monkey banana pie

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How do you make a model ugly? you shoot her in the face.

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When I was a kid, I had a clown at my birthday party. He molested me. Later I found out the clown was my dad.

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There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

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If life gives you melons you're dyslexic.

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I saw a butterfly yesterday with no wings so I poured some red bull on it and BAM! it drowned.

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Why were little Suzie's parents crying? Suzie was kidnapped by Al Qeada

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Fuzzy Whuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Whuzzy has no hair. Fuzzy Whuzzy has Cancer.

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Two strippers are out of work. So they turn to prostitution.

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Joanna walks up to a random house, knocks on the door,"Is this where the party's at?!"

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Frostbite.

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Behind every fat girl is a beautiful woman. No, seriously. Get out of the way.

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Smart Blondes

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A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

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What do u call a black rapper who only raps about sex and money? lil wayne

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Why did the Filipino hate internet advertising? Because navigating around a webpage with pestering visual and audible promotions often proves cumbersome and distracting from the task at hand.

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What did the mute person say to the deaf person? Nothing.

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Why did the blonde have the biggest tits in 3rd grade? She's 21

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Why didn't the family go through the door? Because it was a window.

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You wanna know the funniest joke ever? Justin bieber

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There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night, To find nothing amiss.

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A black man trips and falls down. You help him up and ask him if he needs any help. After a brief friendly talk you both continue on your separate ways.

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What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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