There are two hippos in a bathtub, one says to the other, "pass the soap." the other hippo says, "no soap, radio."

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Sir, your wife has been killed. Please open the door so that we may discuss this matter. The man then opens the door and listens to the tale of how a disgruntled worker opened fire in a grocery store, killing 13 people including his wife. Unable to cope with this and the fact both his parents passed away earlier that year he later hangs himself soon after the police leave.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Although this is a highly improbable scenario, one would assume that, being a chicken, it did not have much of an intuitive idea as to what to do while it was stray for whatever reason in an urbanized area. Considering chickens do not harbor nearly as much of a mental capacity as it would require to even comprehend the concept of a "road" and is impervious to the idea of oncoming traffic and such, the fact that it happened to be crossing the road was in fact not even recognized by the chicken. For this reasons I deem this question unanswerable.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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what happened to the black guy after he turned off the light? he probably wanted to save energy, so he moved to a different room with natural sunlight as a light resource.

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why couldn't the boy eat his oreo's? His sister ate it.

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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why are they called the melbourne storms? Because you turn 360 degrees and walk away

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What's worth than a large pile of dead babies? Nothing, you sick freak.

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How did the guy feel after his wife died? Pretty shitty, I'd imagine..

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A man and two women walk into the a house. When they leave out come 2 babies with them. What happened in that house? They were babysitting.

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What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

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i died. new product by steve jobs. also presenting icoffin, and next year icoffin 2. slightly slimmer with a lock button to keep zombies out.

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Why did the cow die? Because we need meat

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What's the difference between you and a cat? The cats mom isn't a whore.

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Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

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who is the wildest wild one? matt daly

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women's rights.

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The BCS

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How are Polish people and dogs the same? They aren't. One is a human being, and one is a dog. Do not be stupid.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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How do you get a black person to drop chicken? Yell KKK.

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-What do you call a pyromaniac on a golf course? *** I backed over your cat. -A FIREHAZ- wait what?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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