A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are black. Violets are grey. I'm a dog...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

-Knock Knock. -Come in.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q: How many light bulbs does it take to change a blonde? A: One, if she tries to swallow it.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

"knock knock" "who's there?" "its your girlfriend, lets have sex"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock Knock Come in

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats the difference between a nigga and a bucket of shit? the bucket

thumb_up thumb_down +20

whats gayer than 2 homosexuals? 3 homosexuals.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock knock whos there punctuation

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

a blonde and a brunette sit down to take an IQ test. They both scored above average and were very proud.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

You mamma so fat, she should consider going on a diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Knock, knock. Come in.......

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What type of ruler lies? A shatter resistant one

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did the milkman die? Because everyone dies.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the white guy feel awkward at the black people convention? He didn't know anyone there

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

thumb_up thumb_down +18

wanna hear a joke? not really

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Don't think of granny porn

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Josh kissing a girl

thumb_up thumb_down +18

A plane crashed. The pilot was some sort of food, like a loaf of bread or a salad. Neither of which can fly a plane or do much of anything-- like get a plane to move in the first place, let alone take off.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops