Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Whats worse than finding a black man in your bed? After you sleep with him, he tells you he has AIDS.

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Why can't helen keller skii? Because she's dead

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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What would make African women very happy? food and healthcare for their kids, and a proper education.

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Boy: Dad, come here I need to tell you something. Dad: What? Boy: My name is Jeff. Dad: *Grabs shotgun* " I've had with that damn term"

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who farted your mother

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The cow says MOO. Until you shoot it.

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Knock knock Who's there? Doug I'm sorry Doug, I cannot answer the door, as I am a parrot well trained in English. But am locked in a cage.

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Two black guys walk into a bar and arrest the under age drinkers

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hot diggity dog

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You want to hear a joke? Democract

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Why did the black man win the race? Because he was talented and hardworking.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Black guy. Due to your skin tone I feel you may cause potential danger to me and my family, so for that reason I will not allow you to enter my home.

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why was the 40 year old still a virgin? it doesnt know either.

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Whats better than winning gold at the special olympics? Not being retarded

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Why was the tomato blushing? It saw the salad dressing.

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your mommas so ugly it is affecting her self esteem!

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GLaDOS: So... this cat loves lasagna so much that he eats all of the lasagna in his house. Okay, apparently it's not the cat's house or his lasagna. Oh good! The man who owns the lasagna is furious! GLaDOS: The end. GLaDOS: The end? GLaDOS: That's not funny. GLaDOS: Do either of you feel like laughing? GLaDOS: Alright, I'm pulling you out. GLaDOS: Welcome back. While you were dead, I reworked the cartoon. It's up on the screen. GLaDOS: As you can see, in my version the man points out to the cat that the house is equipped with deadly neurotoxin dispensers. GLaDOS: At which point the cat reflects on the time he ate all of the man's lasagna and feels remorse. GLaDOS: Briefly. GLaDOS: Reactions? GLaDOS: Yes, it's funny because most of it actually happened.

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Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Roses are red Violets are red Daisies are red Tulips are red Magnolias are red Weeds are red Carnations are red Crap, my gardens on fire.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Where is my tractor?

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Why did the bunny eat his food

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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