A man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is crippling his family.

How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

I ate a pancake for breakfast not

ARE YOU OKAY? Well thanks for asking actually I could be doing a bit better bu... BUSTER WOLF! Moral: No Im adding moral here, I mean why ask people if they are feeling okay before you break then in half?

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because, the Farmer had treated the Chicken and the rest of his family with great distaste, thus angering the Chicken to the point of rebellion against the Farmer with hopes of inspiring the other abused farm animals to act likewise.

Why was O.J acquitted for murder? A jury of his peers deliberated for many days and found there was not sufficient evidence for his conviction.

Why was the man so unhappy. he died

Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

Why did the asian die? he was driving

Whats big red and eats rocks? A big red rock eater

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

What did the homosexual say to the purse walking down the street? - I'm a homosexual.

what is the difference between oral sex and anal sex? one has to deal with a butt

a rabbi,a priest and minister didn't walk into a bar. Bars are for fun and fun is for not completely insane brainwashed people.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because I threw a fridge at it

What is worse than being blind? Having a brain tumour.

Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

Knock Knock Whose there? Get out of the bathroom Get out of the bathroom who? No, your in the bathroom

Okay chan, you can have it then, I am tired.

Like this joke

Whats brown and smells like poo?? Poo

What did the three bears say when rhey discovered goldilocks? Nothing. They mauled her to death.

Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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